Mid-year Reflection

I'm 25 this year and all I've really done with my life is work. If it isn't work, it was school, even if I was bad at it.

So I've finished college and I'm at my second job of my work history. It's only a minor step above being a poorly paid shift leader but at least work stays at work, and I won't have a manager asking me to take someone's shift, to which I always oblige out of guilt or loyalty because I am a "yes" person.

Over the past six months, I noticed that I had more bad or neutral mood days than good days. I put work as a contributing factor. Then the last week of the 2016, I took a two week trip to East Asia, but after I came back, I was stuck in sadness for a few weeks.

The problem has to be my mindset. I am rarely content. I feel like I have to do more, and be more in life. Even when I'm not doing anything, the task(s) that I feel are important lay in the back of my mind, and I feel terrible for not doing them. I wish I could live as a productive machine, but the fact is, I'm an emotional creature and that disappoints me. I'm fueled by emotion, which can be too much for some people.

In addition .. I also have a weak will. When something happens the opposite of how I wanted it to happen, I take it very personally. Like a child, I [still] absorb in every failure and dwell in it.